Deconstructing FOMO: How to deal with the Fear of Missing Out

The 21st century has seen a generational shift from a penny-saving culture to accumulating lifelong experiences based on the profound yet simple concept of #YOLO.

It defines the existentialism of millennials today. Everyday conversations on social media around travel, food, festivals, weddings, and validating each other’s experiences is only making them hungry for more.

In fact, bootstrapped startups capturing these experiences have gone on to become multi-billion dollar unicorns. The stakes are high on losing out on such experiences. 

Hence, the trend of #FOMO was born. 

Leaping out of bed to check overnight notifications and scrolling through countless stories is not new to any of us. In fact, it’s an addictive habit that has left us with a deep sense of not being enough. Our fear of being left behind has amplified feelings of anxiety, restlessness, and loneliness, leading to long-term mental health concerns. 

What is FOMO? 

The concept of “Fear of Missing Out” or FOMO was coined in 1996 by marketing strategist Dan Herman. While the concept has been around for a few decades, the omnipresence of social media has proliferated the feelings of FOMO.

Scientific literature defines FOMO as “being apprehensive that others are having rewarding experiences from which one is absent.” These articles go on to define behaviours as “a persistent desire to constantly stay connected with what others are doing.”

We constantly find ourselves in a situation with a multiplicity of options, and finite resources limiting us to choose one experience over the others. This leads us to build imaginary scenarios and dream sequences of what it could have been had we gone with the other options.  

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Mental health repercussions of FOMO

Many times, we see “#FOMO” used innocently and casually without realising how it is normalised in our daily conversations. Consistent FOMO has shown to have silent mental health repercussions, easily experienced with feelings of envy, stress, anxiety, unhappiness, and self-loathing.

Research suggests this is most prevalent among adolescents and young adults, who are most impressionable and vulnerable to the glitter of social media. Some of the additional common symptoms include feelings of inferiority, emotional outbursts, irritability, and low self-worth.

With increased internet penetration, this problem will only exacerbate itself unless we become aware of our behaviour and nip it in the bud.  

How to deal with FOMO

At the risk of perpetuating another hashtag, I would replace FOMO with JOMO. 

What is JOMO, you ask? The Joy of Missing Out is a concept of embracing our choices, being in the moment, and experiencing joy with the decision taken. It also allows us to put circumstances in perspective, and

1. Accept

By acknowledging and accepting our fears driven by FOMO. We can create room for our minds to find alternative perspectives. Accept yourself and your decisions. 

2. Follow your Gut

Tune in to your thoughts and emotions and let that be your guide. Trust and believe in yourself. 

3. Shift perspective

We always focus on what we lack rather than focusing on what we have. Redirecting our thoughts by focusing on what we have and seeking help can make you feel confident and cut down the worry of what you’re missing. 

4. Embrace the here and now

Being grounded in the present moment is the key to staying happy and healthy. It helps in reducing anxiety around FOMO and keeps you connected to yourself and those around you.  

5. Disconnect from social media

Watching the highlights of others lives certainly doesn’t make it better when you’re already feeling disappointed about life. Take breaks from gadgets and social media from time to time and reflect on yourself. 

6. Journaling and practising gratitude

Maintaining a journal is a great way to express your emotions. It serves as a release for all the negative thoughts that you may be experiencing. Additionally, fight the FOMO with gratitude — in the little things you experience on a daily basis.