let’s make the sun a metaphor for love and you, the sunflower.
you have to fight for everything you love. you have to tell people you love them often. when they need it the most. when they’re sitting at the edge of their bed and they can’t listen to their favorite song anymore because it brings back something bad. it’s okay. tell them it’s okay. tell them that they should listen to it. tell them to keep everything they love so close, there’ll be no space for anything gray. but also tell them you love them when they don’t need it at all. because you were born to give so much love, it’s meant to shine outwards like sunbeams. you are here and you know it’s okay to love everything too much. you’re going to be there for the people you love even when the porch light is off.
you cannot give up on people. it’s like deciding to not turn on the lights in your house one day because the sun’s going to be around anyway. wait. wait for something you want so badly, you’ve bruised your knuckles hitting the wall because it’s taking too long. some things always take a little too long, don’t they?
be patient. this is very important. you cannot walk away because they’re so sad, you cannot walk away because they’re in a bad place and you’re not, you cannot walk away from their rough day when you had an almost perfect day, you cannot walk away from them if you want everything to be symmetrical to you. there’s no symmetry in love. you can’t just walk away from a mess. don’t fix their mess. they will do it. everyone sorts out their mess eventually. it’s like cleaning your room, you know? one day you just throw your old pair of jeans on the bed and then you wake up one morning and your feet are tangled in it and then you realize it was your favorite pair of jeans. you don’t want to throw it away anymore.
don’t be selfish. when they’re talking all excited and happy, their eyes are so bright you can’t stop smiling, listen to them. maybe you’re the only one who is. maybe you’re the first person they called to tell that they found twenty bucks in their pocket and they’re so excited, they’re jumping in the air. when someone tells you first that they’re happy about something, have you thought how lucky you are? that they picked up their phone to call someone, and they first thought of you?
be excited for them. be happy for them. maybe you’re the only one who can be.
you know when you can’t tell anyone that you’re crying in the bathroom with a towel inside your mouth because they just watched a movie they really loved or went to the beach watching seagulls and they just had a really good day, but you’re crying so much it feels like death, and your chest is really heavy, because you can’t be selfish, i know that. i know how it feels. and it’s terrible. but it works both ways. it’s really important to understand and accept that it’s not always the colorful part of the spectrum and happiness are just not a permanent concept in the theory of love. it’s okay to vent out to anyone you think who is there for you on any lane in your good or bad place. if you trust them enough to not walk away from you when you’re crying dark tears, you might have just found something so precious it’ll be horrible if you lose it.
and everything i’ve ever written comes down to one thing i believe in the most.
to give love, always. to believe in love. to always, always, choose to fight for something and someone you love. i don’t know if it’ll be worth it because sometimes you make mistakes loving the wrong thing or wrong person and it might bring out terrible consequences but you don’t throw out the pair of jeans because you just assume it won’t fit you, right? you keep it.
because, you can’t take a sunflower at dusk, stand on an empty lane, look up to the sky and make the flower grow when there’s no sun.